It’s so overwhelming being a mom, especially a first time mom. Before that baby arrives you start planning for all of the million things that will need to be done. There is so much to think about: which laundry detergent to buy, bottle or breast, what size clothes baby will need, making your house baby proof, products baby will need and products you will need to heal after birth…the list could go on forever and not to mention how to care for another human being. And to top it all off you are preparing for an arrival with only a rough estimate of when he or she will actually show up. It’s like planning for a high-maintenance guest to show up and stay when they say, “I’ll be there sometime in February”. That in itself can be stressful.
Trying to Manage it All
When I first brought my son home I was in love but also sore and tired and frustrated (we just could not get the hang of nursing) and tired (did I mention that already?). Well he was up wanting to eat every two hours. I was just trying to do everything right, everything everyone told me was the right thing to do. But….I felt like I couldn’t eat or shower or do laundry or feed the baby very well. Thankfully my husband was home and was a huge help but it still didn’t take the pressure off.
Then company would come. It was SO nice having them and the help but at some point I would have to figure this all out on my own. Nursing was hard and painful and I chatted with someone about my struggles and they looked right at me and told me that maybe it wasn’t for me and I should quit. That was pretty discouraging especially when I just wanted someone to listen. All these little things I had been stressing about just became too much.
Lesson Learned
One day someone said to me, “You can’t do it all and it’s OK!” I didn’t need to do everything! That really struck a nerve. I was spending so much emotional energy worrying about all those little things. Who cares if I don’t get the laundry done or dinner on the table or the dishes washed? I had just made and delivered a person out of my body and I needed to cut myself some slack.
Moving Forward
Those words that someone said to me still hold true even now that my kids are older. Well that and “pick your battles”. LOL Life is hard. Parenting is harder. It is so easy to get caught up in all the little things we need to provide for our kids. We love our kids and do what is best for them. That is what they need. They don’t need perfection, thank God! All those little things just do not matter in the grand scheme of life. It’s hard to move past all of that and really relax into the busy-ness of being a mom. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Life is too short. Enjoy your kids while they are young and cut yourself some slack.
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